I sometimes wonder what they are doing, how they are. Sometimes more than I am ever willing to admit. They were there, we were friends, but in the blink of an eye, all that seems to have disappeared. Apparently, absence does not make the heart grow fonder. No. It makes the heart forget. Or maybe it has shown that what you thought was real may have never existed. The great thing about that being that you will never know because it is doubtful the person will ever tell you themselves.
I am thinking about her again. Thinking and thinking, but not talking. I don’t know what to say anymore. ‘I am sorry’ doesn’t seem quite right, I don’t think I have anything to apologize for. ‘I miss you’ sounds so inane, but it is surprisingly true. I miss her. She was my best friend for so long.
So what do you do after you lose touch? After a friendship has grown cold? I actually ventured onto Facebook to try to talk to her, but I just couldn’t figure out what to say. “Hi.” It is really inane and she probably won’t reply to me, she never has whenever I have tried talking to her before. I am sorry for that.
I wish we hadn’t grown apart. I wish we hadn’t stopped talking. I wish I knew why things ended up this way, but I don’t have a clue. So we remain as strangers who were once friends. High school acquaintances and nothing more. I wish it were more.
Another mystery that hurts my brain entirely too much.